When you lose a child, one of your fears is that they will be forgotten. On this page, you will find ways that we honor and remember our children, on holidays, birthdays or any time, also you will find things we do in our children's memories.
This past year on Josh's birthday I made him his favorite cake, chocolate on chocolate. I went and bought the best brand of ice cream and we all sat at the dinner table and ate cake and ice cream by candlelight. I figured the candles represented him in 2 ways, one way was the typical birthday candles and the other is the way we represent and remember our children by lighting candles. It was very peaceful and I would watch the flames of the candles knowing that he was with us.....:) It was very special and I am thinking of doing it each year now.
Another thing we do on his birthday is of course the balloon release. Last year Jake and Britt and Alan and I all picked out a special balloon from us personally. Those 3 released their balloons while it was daylight, I waited (and have each year) until 10:19 at night, his birth time, then I release mine....
I do acts of kindness in Shane's memory. I printed up business cards that say "this Act of Kindness in memory of Shane Hebert" I do different things with them, one I do a lot, is I go through the drive thru at fast food restaurants, when I pay for my order, I also pay for the order behind me and give the cashier one of the cards. When they come up to pay for their order, the cashier tells them is has been paid for and gives them the card. My husband is a mechanic and several times he has stopped to help people on the side of the road, when they try to pay him, he just hands them a card.
I light candles for Shane on special days and we release balloons for him.
To remember my son I light candles all night around him on special occasions, those kind a the grocery store are deep so it keeps them from blowing out. Then at home I light one too.
On his birthday I made a brownie and put a candle in it. Also I try to take him something as a small gift like I left him a small figurine of two dolphins jumping this year, a two red roses one from his brother and one from me. This spring I'll plant flowers for him.
We have a memorial bench for Jake, 3 plaques that have been erected, one in his school another where he was killed and also in our church.
We hold candle lighting services
We collect and take teddy bears to sick children in the hospital, it is called "Hugs from Heaven"
I buy books for a library or preschool or elementary school, with book tags inside the cover dedicating the book with Tanner's name.
Decorate one small Christmas tree with mini ornaments, to be totally dedicated to your loved one. If your son or daughter liked sports...baseball, bat, etc. Or flowers that they liked or hobbies they had. I just hot glue them on and we put the whole tree out every year next to a picture of him. My tree for Tanner has all baby things on it. Tiny shoes, little pacifiers, bears in diapers, baby bracelets. (Much of mine were actually little shower favors.)
About 1 month before Andrew's birthday, we sent out index cards to everyone who knew him such as, teachers, friends, relatives,doctors,bus drivers ,neighbors, Church Members etc. On a note I made up along with the index card I asked everyone to send us their most favorite memory of Andrew ... As we recieved the cards we put them unopened in a basket and waited until his bday to gather around our immedate family to open them.. Not only did we grieve but also celebrated his Bday even if he was not here with us in body... The memories showed us he will always be here in Spirit... Some Memories I never knew about, Some were so minor that I wouldnt of thought that he would of touched people lives by something he just did naturally...