Our Featured Mom for the month of March is Ann Warych
Hi all Angel Moms. I am Ann Warych and very surprized and honored to be April's Featured Mom. I found this group in November from a Compassioned Friends member. I am very happy to have become a member of this group, although I wish I didn't have to be. I try to read all of the posts but there is not enough hours in the day to read all of them. I hope when I respond I help all who read the posts. Thank you for choosing me as April's Featured Mom.My husband, Ray and I have been married for almost 24 years. We have two children, Ray Jr., who will be 21 in May and Our Angel Julia who would be 19 now. Julia was born Dec 8, 1986. She went through all of the major grades in school, some with extra help. We have worked very hard to support my children emotionally, physically, and everyway else we could. I was very involved in school from the time our son was in first grade all the way through senior year in high school for both of my children. Our son is in the US NAVY since graduating high school in 2003.
May 29, 2005 our daughter Julia became an instant Angel as a result of a car accident. The whole family including aunts, uncles, and many cousins are and were devistated by this tragedy in our family. As we all know there are times when I feel I can't go on. As you can tell I am still here. At Julia's wake the director of the atletic dept. at school gave me a plaque wwith Julia's name, picture, and all the things she did in high school for four years. He had told me that I had to make a choice to keep the plaque, give it back, or have a duplicate made. I was going to give it back, but wanted a duplicate. He then told me they would make a duplicate for school and I could keep the original. The school plaque is in the main athletic hallway in the bowling section since julia was in Girls Bowling all four years. She was in Tennis for the first three years. I just found out that the choir boosters of the high school are also going to have a plaque in the choir room with her picture also. Julia was in choirs all four years. As a senior Julia had a senior solo in the Dec.concert. She sang great that night. the best all year. Julia was in Snowball which deals with self esteem and not using drugs etc. for four years. Julia didn't get to see her graduation from high school. The accident was exactly one week before her graduation. The whole school when I went there to pick up her Year Book, Graduation Gown, and Diploma all I had to say I was Julia's mom. EVERYONE was crying.
In Julia's memory we have donated money to two churches for things they wanted for children, to A.D.O.P.T. an animal shelter, and to The Compassionate Friends for helping me.
Our whole family and extended family miss Julia very much and want to be with her together very much.
Julia's Page
JELLY BEAN POEM FOR EASTER
RED is for my love for you that will never sever...
For love is not measured by the time we had together...
But what's in our hearts forever.
GREEN is for memories that I always will treasure...
Although, time may pass...our memories will last...
forever and ever and ever.
YELLOW is for sunshine that you have given me...
You brightened up my life and made my world shine...
And will continue to shine brilliantly for the rest of time.
ORANGE is for the candles flame I light in memory of you...
Flame that glows so bright as I speak your name in prayer...
Asking God to hold you close...until I join you there.
BLACK is for my grief from my broken shattered heart...
Taking each day one at a time...as I keep your memory alive...
Life is different...I am different...but I CAN and WILL survive.
PURPLE is for tears I shed as I remember you...
Precious memories you left behind...preserved deep inside...
You will always live on through our family...forever by our side.
White is for my hope and faith in God above...
The promise of resurrection...knowing we will reunite...
Above the clouds...over the rainbow...in His everlasting light.
PINK is for the signs you send from Heaven up above...
Lighting my path where I go...and whatever I may do...
My precious child...I will always love...and always remember you.
Remembering you on Easter....and ALWAYS.
Author Unknown
5 Years
It will be 5 years April 29th since Tiffany became an angel. In a way it seems like it was yesterday and then again it seems so long ago because i miss her so much. In thinking back I feel the first year was just kind of a blur i know i was in shock and the hurt was so bad that my mind tryed to block out some of the pain, but there is no way it could.My memory of the first year is very sketchy but i do remember the awful pain. The second year was as hard as the first year maybe because i realized that my beautiful daughter wasn't coming home.That year also my son Clint was moving out to go to college and my oldest son Danny was getting married and moving out so i knew me and my husband would be here alone. 3rd year, Me and my Husband work together trying to make a life with out our precious daughter in it , she is always in our thoughts and in our heart.Losing Tiffany was so very hard but i was also going through the empty nest syndrome and i knew i needed to pull myself togetheir for my family and for myself. The 4th year, In this 4th year i have found some peace i will always miss Tiffany and she will always be a part of me. But now I can look forward, before i just couldn't, that just hurt to much knowing Tiffany wouldn't be there.I know in my heart that Tiffany is watching over me and wants me to smile again and try to enjoy life and one day i know i will see her beautiful face again.I have a new grand baby now and i want to tell him all about his Aunt Tiffany, I know she would love him so much. I think at looking back over the last 5 years that i am starting to do better at dealing with this horrible grief but i know the pain will never go away i have learned to live and deal with the pain.I wouldn't want all the pain to go away because that would mean that i have forgotten Tiffany and i will never never forget her.I will try to enjoy life as much as i can because i know that's what Tiffany would want .I hope in you reading this you see that there is alot to look forward to in life, life is so precious and our angels would want us to live a happy life and while we are living our happy life we can also keep our children's memory alive.
Love Holly
April is a bitter-sweet month for me. On the 12th of this month, Shane's twin daughters, Krista and Kristen will turn nine years old. This is my reality check when it comes to how long Shane has been gone.
They were only six months old when we lost Shane. They don't remember him, but they know who he is and how much he loved them. They know they have a very special Daddy, an "Angel Daddy." We share the memories we have of the three of them together. We have pictures of Shane everywhere and they even have their very own "Daddy Book" full of pictures, stories, and memories. Since they were babies, we have been taking them to the cemetery, they love decorating Shane's grave for holidays and special occasions. They love sending balloons to him with messages on them. To see them do this brings a sadness to me, but for them there is no sadness in it, it is all they know when it comes to doing things for their Daddy.
Shane and his girls have missed out on so much. One of the greatest ways I can honor Shane is to keep his memory alive for his daughters.
This past week I posted that I was ‘taking a break ‘ from the group for a bit, and I wanted to touch on that topic this month – the ‘emotional rest’ we all must grant ourselves once in awhile. As fate would have it, I have been reading a book by Elisabeth Kữbler-Ross, a well known author on grief and dying, called On Grief And Grieving, and she offers the following on the subject of taking an emotional rest, and how important it can be in the healing process.
Emotional Rest
We are not accustomed to the emotional upheaval that accompanies a loss. People experience a wide array of emotions after a loss, from not caring, to being on edge, to feeling angry or sad about everything. We can go from feeling okay to feeling devastated in a minute without warning. We can have mood swings that are hard for anyone around us to comprehend, because even we don’t understand them. One minute we are okay. The next we’re in tears. This is how grief works.
We can touch the pain directly for only so long until we have to back away. We think about our work, get momentarily distracted in something else, process the feelings, and go for more. If we did not go back and forth emotionally, we could never have the strength to find peace in our loss. In order to give your emotions a rest, you have to accept things as they are. You have been through a lot. Your emotions are playing out on a new terrain, with emotional lows and higs and occasional highs that you are not prepared or equipped to handle.
The loss is not over and the pain is not gone. You had bad days before any of this happened, so don’t be hard on yourself for having them now. Figure out what rests your emotions and do it without judgement – things like getting lost in movies, TV, music, a change of scenery, a trip away, being outdoors, or just having nothing to do. Even when we feel we are giving our emotions a rest, it may feel forced and awkward. But you have been in such a heightened state that anything less will feel empty. Your life has been out of balance and will be for some time. It will take time to find a new balance. Your emotions, just like your body, need to repair.
Elisabeth Kữbler-Ross
BR> I wish everyone a peaceful and blessed Easter!
Love and hugs,
Krista, mom to Angel Zackary
I have recently passed the 5 year mark of being without my daughter. I wanted to share some of my feelings with you. Those of you who have been on your grief journey longer than I have will probably admit to sharing some or all of the same feelings. Those of you who are new to this long road, I wish for you hope in the knowledge that your pain will ease as you continue to put one foot in front of the other and live on. As we’ve all heard, time heals all. Well whoever coined that phrase couldn’t have possibly ever lost a child. Yes, time softens the hurt. But heal? No way! We all will forever have holes in our hearts that will never completely heal.
After 5 years I can talk about Jill to anyone and everyone without breaking into tears. It does my heart so much good when people still ask about her. One thing I will not do again is say that I only have one child when someone who doesn’t know me asks. I did that once and it felt so wrong. Why in the world didn’t I just say I have one son and a daughter in heaven? From this day forward when someone asks how many children I have I always say I have a 28 year old son and a daughter who would be 25 now. I have and always will have 2 children.
After 5 years I can visit Jill at the cemetery without falling apart. I like to talk to her about all the Angel Mom kids up there in heaven with her and how they have all gotten together and brought all of us together. I truly believe that Jill steered me to Angel Moms and the lifelong friends I have made there. After 5 years I fall asleep at night with her picture on the nightstand next to me and her pillow in my arms peacefully instead of crying myself to sleep. Don’t think I never have my “moments” because we will all have them for the rest of our lives. The other day I was cleaning out a drawer and found some special greeting cards I had saved. You guessed it, there was one from Jill. It was a Mother’s Day card in which she wrote how much I meant to her and how I had taught her some valuable life lessons and how much she would always love me. That triggered tears! I couldn’t stop them nor did I want to. They were tears of sadness because she’s no longer here but tears of love for the words she wrote for me.
So as we all go down the road of grief some of us will travel faster than others. But we all have the end of the road to look forward to. Where our kids will be waiting for us and we can be with them again forever. Take heart---life is short, eternity is not.
This Journey of Grief
I ran a Half Marathon this week – 13.1 miles. I ran it in my worst time ever, but that wasn’t important to me. I had entered the More Half-Marathon with every intention of training for this race. Then between work and home, I trained very little. I was anxious about not being prepared, but surprisingly enough, not overly concerned about my lack of fitness as the race began. After all, there is only one way to run a race-one step at a time moving forward. I got my Ipod playing and we were off. The More Marathon and Half-Marathon is a race for women of 40 and up only. There is something nice about that. The husbands, boyfriends, fathers, sons and friends dot the course, holding up signs and cheering us on. Although none of these were my husband or son, these guys cheered all of us on; 4,000 women, streaking, jogging, walking – doing their personal best.
After all was said and done, I knew I could at least finish. Then I spotted a woman, whose shirt had written on the back, “Eric/Nicole…Running to remember”. As I read her shirt, I had trouble choking back the tears. She was running to remember and I felt that I was running to forget. I struggled with this idea. How could I be running to forget? Then I realized that I wasn’t trying to forget Mike. I was just trying to fill a void and forget the pain I am in. I just didn’t write it on the back of my shirt.
This journey of grief can only be traveled one step at a time the best way you can. There are no quick fixes. We are all unprepared for this journey. Please remember to hug yourselves and the people who never stop caring about you. This is a marathon, not even a half-marathon. Once the race began, there was only one way to run it-doing your personal best and trying to move forward.
I wish all of you a blessed holiday season. Welcome Spring with open arms!
Our Champion, Forever Our Little Braveheart
Hi everyone after 3 months of being apart of the newsletter, I thought I should introduce myself and my angel Sean. My name is Mylčne, I'm 38 and I'm from Montreal, Quebec, Canada. I'm engaged to a wonderful man (Sean's daddy) who has a 13 year old daughter, Kaitlyn. When I was 24 weeks pregnant we found out that Sean would be born with multiple complexe congenital heart defects. Sean spent the 1st month in NICU and PICU, where he underwent his first heart surgery at 14 days young. I also spent that first month in the hospital, I couldn't bring myself to leave. So I stayed in a room reserved for parents on another floor. We are very blessed to have had him home for 5 months, where he brought Love, Joy and Happiness in our home, his home. Sean enjoyed life to the fullest and his smile could light up anyone's heart. He got to enjoy a "normal" life, he splashed in the bath, giggled and had discovered his feet. Sean truly Loved Life. The last 2 months of Sean's life were spent in PICU where he underwent 2 heart surgeries, and was examined from the tip of his hair to the tip of his toes, because what was supposed to be a routine procedure (BT Shunt) turned out to be the beginning of a long 2 month nightmare. For some reason Sean did not respond well to this operation and kept going into shock, which shut down all his vital organs, 6 times. I never left the hospital, I just couldn't. Sean had faught all he could and we had to let him go. Sean passed away peacefully in my arms a week after his 3rd heart surgery on July 8th 2005, he is forever 8 months young. I can still feel him, how it felt holding him, smelling him, my little man, my Champion. Sean touched many, many lives most of those he never got a chance to meet. He taught me what true unconditional love truly is. I miss and love him more and more each day. Feel free to visit the love of my life, my only child, my son, my Champion, Sean.
http://sean-lockhart.memory-of.com/about.aspx
Sean Maman is sending you tonnes of hugs and kisses from here to heaven ! Gentle hugs to everyone !
Bumble Bees
A great idea for the classroom or other groups of children—easy and fun to make.
Prep time: 15 min.
Difficulty: Easy
What you'll need:
1 SNICKERS® Brand Egg 3-Pack
M&M’S® Brand Milk Chocolate Candies for Easter
1 tube decorative yellow icing
Yellow construction paper
Printable template
What to do:
Using the printable template, cut 6 hearts from the construction paper for the bumble bee's wings.
Unwrap the SNICKERS® Brand Eggs and place both halves flat on a counter.
With the decorative icing, pipe lines over the eggs. Dot the lines with the M&M'S® Brand Milk Chocolate Candies for Easter.
Dot each wing with icing, and then press it underneath an egg, with one wing on either side of each egg.
Makes 6 bumble bees.
Angelic Bunny Pin
Paints
Delta: Gyspy Rose Light Ivory
Deco: Blue Mist, Avocado, Black, Light cinnamon, White
Jo Sonja: Burgundy
Clear Glazing medium or Kleister Medium
Supplies
1 - 2 1/2" x 1 1/4" x 3/16" primitive heart
1 - 3/4" furniture button
2 - 1" wooden hearts
1" pin back
2"x2" 140 lb watercolor paper
Krylon Matte Finish
E-6000 Adhesive
Sand wood pieces and dust with tack cloth.
Transfer scallop pattern for dress onto large heart.
Transfer ears onto watercolor paper and cut out now or wait until the ears have been painted.
Base
Lt. Ivory: Feet & head.
Blue Mist: Dress.
White: 2 1" hearts (wings)..
Gypsy Rose: Three roses on dress
Gypsy Rose: Shade (float) on feet at dress edge on front, sides and back and then between feet. Shade inside of ears.
Burgundy: Shade center and bottom of roses. Add second value on feet where both feet meet dress.
Mix Gypsy Rose + White: place comma strokes on the left side of roses.
Burgundy: Comma strokes on the right side of roses.
Avocado: Leaves are sit downs around the roses.
Light Cinnamon: Dot eyes.
Black: Dip dot heart for nose. Gypsy Rose: Stipple cheeks. Dip dots in sets of three on dress.
Lt. Ivory: Single dots on dress. Highlight in upper left or right of eye.
Black: Use liner for whiskers & mouth.
Comma strokes on wings are done by dressing brush with clear glazing medium or kleister medium and then picking up Blue Mist. This will give you a more transparent stroke.
Finishing Sand areas that will be glued together to help adhesion. Glue wings together & let dry. Roll ears around large brush handle to give them shape. Glue ears to back of head & let dry. Glue head to body & body to wings & let dry. Glue pin back to the back of wings, it may help to prop bunny up on the top of a paint bottle so it will dry flat. Spray two coats of Krylon Matte on all sides and you're done. Enjoy!
The Easter Collection
By Holly Christian, HGTV Ideas magazine
Photographs by Charles Brooks
Eggs: They're not only a symbol of new life connected with spring and Easter, they 're also perfect little blank canvases for creating tiny works of art.
If you're like me, you can't get enough of egg decorating. During our annual family egg-decorating party I'm the biggest kid of all, dyeing my quota of eggs in record time. When my allotment of eggs is used up, I dye them all over again, using a piece of candle to make wax-resist patterns.
Wax resist dyed eggs ------------- Gold- and silver-leafed eggs
If you're willing to venture beyond the tried and true, try gold- and silver-leafed eggs or "collage" eggs made with art tissue paper. Or buy cardboard eggs from a craft store and dress them up with colorful paper or paint, paint pens and ribbon. And if you're truly adventuresome, make a moss-covered egghead or try HGTV craft queen Carol Duvall's method of inserting tiny pictures into an egg.
Preparing Eggs for Decorating
Eggs can be hard-boiled so they can be eaten, or blown out while raw. Blowing out an egg involves removing the yolk and white while leaving the shell mostly intact . The traditional methods of egg decorating, such as Pysanky--Ukrainian Easter egg decorating--use raw eggs. The contents of the shell eventually dry up completely over time, and symbolically the traditional raw egg is the best type of egg to keep , as the "might" of the egg remains in the shell. If you choose to decorate raw eggs , remember that they are fragile, and if they break before fully dry, they will release those noxious, rotten-egg fumes.
Blowing Eggs
For this technique, make a small hole with a needle at either end of the egg, being sure to pierce the yolk. Place your mouth over one end and blow gently until all the contents are out. The USDA says because some raw eggs may contain salmonella , you must use caution when blowing out eggs. Use only eggs that have been kept refrigerated and are uncracked. To destroy bacteria that may be present on the surface of the egg, wash the egg in hot water and then rinse in a solution of one teaspoon chlorine bleach per half cup of water. Rinse well in warm water again.
Art Tissue-Paper Collage Eggs
Cut or tear small pieces of art tissue paper (it won't bleed when wet) and stick them to hard-boiled eggs with Mod Podge or diluted white glue. We used a 1/2-inch brush to cover the egg with glue mixture and then set the tissue-paper pieces in place. Brush glue on the stuck-on pieces, then add more pieces, overlapping as you go. Seal the finished egg with two or three coats of Mod Podge. This process can also be used on foam, wooden or cardboard eggs. The cardboard eggs shown on the Easter feather tree were covered with paper (the trick: cut slits at each end of a rectangular piece of paper the length of the egg. Glue one little strip at a time, overlapping as you go). Cardboard eggs can also be painted and decorated with markers.
Tissue paper collage eggs ------------ Photo eggs
Fun Family Photo Eggs
Gaze into a teenie-weenie egg to view a beloved family member or pet. Thanks to HGTV's Carol Duvall (see CDS-568) for perfecting these gazing eggs. We covered them with art tissue-paper collage. The outside of the egg is decorated first, then the egg is drained and the snapshot is affixed inside.
Tips for selecting photographs: The photo image should be small enough to fit inside the egg with extra room at the top. If the selected image is too large, use a copy machine to reduce it to the proper size. Original photographs are sturdy enough to stand without support. If you use a photocopy, either laminate it or glue it to an index card to give it more body.
Materials:
Raw eggs at room tempature
decorative materials for outside of egg: art tissue paper, decorative napkins or metal leaf
decorative materials for inside back of egg: art tissue paper, craft paint or small scenery photo
scissors
Mod Podge or diluted white glue
flat brush about 1/2 inch wide
cuticle scissors
snapshots
small piece of cardboard
strip of card stock for stand
Steps:
1. Decorate the outside of the raw egg. We used the art tissue-paper collage method. Thin layers of decorative napkins are an alternative to tissue paper. Gold- or silver-leafing is also an option. Note: If gold- or silver-leafing the outside of the egg, cut the hole and rinse out the egg (steps 2 and 3) before painting or attaching the gold leaf.
2. Using cuticle scissors with blades closed, poke a small hole in one side of the egg, then open the scissors and cut an opening. Follow the outline of the egg when cutting the opening; it should be large enough to easily accommodate the photo image inside but small enough to give the illusion of looking inside something.
3. Thoroughly rinse out the inside of the egg with running water. If you plan to paint the inside of the egg instead of covering it with a picture or tissue paper, remove the membrane so it will not flake out later.
4. If you line the interior of the egg with tissue paper, use the same method as used for the outside of the egg, and extend the tissue paper over the edge of the hole to the outside to create a finished edge. If using a paper scene for the background, first create a pattern by placing the egg, opening side down, on a piece of paper. Draw a line around the egg about 3/4 inch from the outer edge. Cut this out. Draw a second oval inside the first about 3/4 inch from the outer edge. Cut many slashes from the outer edge to the drawn oval. Push it into the egg. It should fit reasonably well with most of the inside of the egg covered. Any protruding paper can be snipped off. This will be your pattern.
5. Place the pattern on the background photo, trace around and cut it out. Slash around the outer edge and push it into the egg. It should hold snugly without any gluing.
6. Cut the selected image and fit it into the egg. It should look as if it is on the ground and not floating in the air. Experiment to see where the image looks the best. It will give the illusion of most dimension if it not placed too far to the front or the back. When you've determined the placement, glue the image into position using a small folded strip of cardboard glued or taped to the back of the picture as well as to the inside back wall of the egg.
7. If grass is desired, cut many tiny pieces of green tissue paper and place them inside the egg.
8. Make a small stand for the egg with a ring of cardstock or lightweight cardboard. Cut a 1/2-inch wide strip about six inches long. Cut a slit at each end of the strip on opposite sides, about an inch in from the end, and interlock the slits to form a ring. Glue the ends flat.
Eggs-cellent Eggheads
Glue a photo of your favorite pretty face to a wooden egg and surround with a headful of sheet-moss "hair." Use white glue to attach the photo to the egg and hot glue to attach the moss.
Eggs-cellent eggheads ------------- Wax resist egg
Wax-Resist Dyed Eggs
Dye eggs the old-fashioned way with food color and vinegar. The directions on the food coloring package make it easy: add one teaspoon of vinegar to 1/2 cup boiling water and add 20 drops of the desired color. You're not limited to the red, yellow, blue and green enclosed; follow the recipes on the back of the package to create lots of great colors like orange sunset, jungle green and teal blue. Make patterned eggs by drawing on a dyed egg with a piece of wax--a candle stub about three inches long, quartered lengthwise and sharpened works well--then dipping the egg in another color. The waxed area will resist the new dye color, making your drawn design visible . Create a complex surface design by overdyeing two or three times, drawing a new pattern between each dye bath. If you end up with eggs the color of mud, just rinse them off and begin again.
A Tisket, a Tasket, a Cardboard Basket
Our grass-green Easter basket was another Carol Duvall inspiration (see CDS-568). Ours is made with corrugated cardboard salvaged from an old box, then painted with acrylic craft paints. Make your own using recycled cardboard, or buy new corrugated with the flutes already exposed. For a glimmery look try metallic corrugated paper, available at art supply shops.
Materials:
corrugated cardboard
ruler
pen or pencil
craft knife
scissors
medium - and fine-grit sandpaper
white glue
acrylic craft paint and paintbrush
Mod Podge or polyurethane sealer - optional
Corrugated cardboard basket
Steps:
1. Determine the size you want your basket to be. Ours is 8" x 10" with 4-inch-high sides. Draw a square or rectangle the size of the bottom of the basket in the middle of your piece of cardboard. Draw another square or rectangle around the first one to correspond with the height you want the sides of the basket to be. In our example, this line is four inches from the first rectangle, to correspond to the height of the sides. Draw another line 3/4 inch beyond the outside line all the way around.
2. Draw a line from each corner of the inside square to the corresponding corner on the outside square. Draw another line on each side of this line from the inside corner to the outside edge (figure A). The lines should be the same length .
3. Along one of these lines in each corner, draw another line about 1/2 inch away from the first line and parallel to it (figure B).
Figure B
Figure
4. Cut out as indicated by the dark lines in figure C.
5. Peel the paper off one side of the cardboard to reveal the fluted corrugation . If the paper doesn't peel off easily, use a craft knife to cut slits in the paper in the valleys between the flutes before peeling it away. If necessary, use sandpaper to remove any bits of paper backing that remain on the fluting.
6. Turn the cardboard over and use a ruler and a pencil to score along the fold lines.
7. The corner tabs will hold adjoining sides of the basket together. To join each corner, fold the corner tabs to the inside. Apply glue to the corrugated side of each tab, then fold adjoining sides upward and hold in place.
8. Make a handle for the basket with a long length of corrugated cardboard folded in half. Cut the piece of cardboard double the width of the finished handle with the flutes running across the handle. If the flutes run along the length of the handle, it will not be flexible. Peel the backing off one side of the cardboard, draw a fold line lengthwise down the middle of the other side, score the fold line, then fold to form handle. Glue the two sides of the handle together.
9. Paint the basket and handle with acrylic craft paint.
10. Glue the handle in place on the basket.
11. Seal the painted surface, if desired, with Mod Podge or polyurethane.
A Heavy-Metal Easter!
Heavy metal basket with eggs
There are lots of products available to add a sophisticated metallic sparkle to your Easter eggs or baskets. Use Liquid Leaf paint, metallic ink and paint pens, or actual silver and gold leaf. To gold- or silver-leaf an egg, first brush the egg with gold-leaf adhesive size. When the adhesive changes from milky white to clear (usually 30 to 60 minutes), gently press the leaf in place. Dust away the excess with a soft brush or cloth.
Add shine to an ordinary inexpensive woven basket with coppery metallic leafing paint and a silver leafing pen. Brush on Liquid Leaf in copper and add silver highlights with a Krylon metallic leafing pen. Fill the basket with spun copper from Loose Ends and metallic eggs in copper and gold and silver leaf.
Safety note: Gold-leaf adhesive and metallic paint and ink all give off harmful vapors. Reserve these projects for adults only, and be sure to always use these products in a well-ventilated area.
It takes a lot of courage to face grief head on and say, “Today I will recognize that you are part of my life. Today I will wrestle with you. Today you will not rule over me. Today I will face my fear.”
So much of grief is fear. Fear of the unknown journey ahead. Fear of not knowing how to handle those emotional reminders of loss. Fear of feeling so empty and alone.
Fear of beginning a journey that feels so new and different and completely wrong. When loss enters our lives, our world as we once knew it suddenly feels like we are on foreign soil. We don't know how to speak the language, and we don't want to learn. Yet, we know that we are now living in a new place in life and we must face the days ahead with a resolve to go on.
Hope seems to know just when to appear to give us the courage needed to make it through the hour. A stranger smiles and we know that person truly wants us to feel some connection. The billowy clouds float without effort through the heavenly skies and remind us that God is watching over us. The birds begin chirping their springtime song, and we know that our winter season will soon change to spring.
The sun appears brighter than ever and the warmth reaches all the way to the depths of our soul.
Today is a brand new day, and you can grasp hold of some hope and defeat your fear. One day at a time. One step at a time. One thought at a time. You can make it! --Clara. Hinton
“Fear can be conquered when hope abides in the center of the heart.” --Clara Hinton
Acts Of Kindness
Acts of Kindness for December were presented to:
Cookie Harrigan by Pattisue Rielly
Diana Stafford by Donna Adkins
Diana Stafford by Katharine Teske "Katz"
Donna Adkins by Denise Jones
The Act Of Kindness Award will be given to an AngelMom that was nominated for their kindness and thoughtfulness. It will not be a contest, it is "Thank You" kind of award. Anyone can be nominated. If someone has touched your heart by doing something special, please nominate them by emailing Loni. There is no exclusions, everyone is included. We will list each member that has received an Award.
Angel Mom's Acts of Kindness
SUGGESTIONS TO AID MARRIAGE AFTER LOSS OF A CHILD
1. Don't expect your spouse to be a tower of strength when he or she is also experiencing grief.
2. Be sensitive to your spouse's personality style. In general, he or she will approach grief with the same personality habits as they approach life. It may be very private, very open and sharing, or someplace in between.
3. Find a "sympathic ear" (not necessarily our mate) - someone who cares and will listen.
4. Do talk about your child with your spouse. If necessary set up a time period daily when you both know that it is time to talk about the child.
5. Seek the help of a counselor if depression, grief or problems in your marriage are getting out of hand.
6. Do not overlook or ignore anger-causing situations. It is like adding fuel to a fire. Eventually there is an explosion. Deal with things as they occur.
7. Remember, you loved your spouse enough to marry. Try to keep your marriage alive: go out for dinner; take a walk; go on vacation.
8. Be gentle to yourself and your mate.
9. Join a support group for bereaved parents. Attend as a couple, come by yourself, or with a friend. It is a good place to learn about grief and to feel understood. Do not pressure your spouse to attend with you if it is not his or her preference.
10. Join a mutually agreeable community betterment project.
11. Do not blame yourself or your mate for what you were powerless to prevent. If you blame your spouse or personally feel responsible for your child's death, seek immediate counseling for yourself and your marriage.
12. Realize that you are not alone. There are many bereaved parents, both locally and nationally.
13. Choose to believe again in the goodness of God and of life. Search for joy and laughter.
14. Recognize your extreme sensitivity and vulnerability and be alert to the tendency to take things personally.
15. Read about grief, especially the books written for bereaved parents.
16. Take your time with decisions about your child's things, change of residence, etc.
17. Be aware of unrealistic expectations for yourself or your mate.
18. Remember, there is no timetable. Everyone goes through grief differently, even parents of the same child.
19. Try to remember that your spouse is doing the best he or she can.
20. Marital friction is normal in any marriage. Don't blow it out of proportion.
21. Try not to let little everyday irritants become major issues. Talk about them and try to be patient.
22. Be sensitive to the needs and wishes of your spouse as well as yourself. Sometimes it is important to compromise.
23. It is very important to keep the lines of communication open.
24. Work on your grief instead of wishing that your spouse would handle his or her grief differently. You will find that you will have enough just handling your own grief. Remember, when you help yourself cope with grief it indirectly helps your spouse.
25. As Harriet Schiff states, "Value your marriage. You have lost enough."
26. Hold on to HOPE. With time, work, and support you will survive. It will never be the same, but you can learn again to appreciate life and the people in your life.
Brownie Cakes In A Jar Recipe
2 Canning jars; wide mouth
1 c All-purpose flour
1 c Sugar
1/2 ts Baking soda
1/4 ts Ground cinnamon (optional)
1/3 c Butter or Margarine
1/4 c -Water
3 tb Unsweetened cocoa powder
1/4 c Buttermilk
1 Egg; beaten
1/2 ts Vanilla extract
1/4 c Walnuts; finely chopped
Here's one you can start out with, it makes 2 jars. Every recipe technique is the same, just different ingredients.. Sterilize, two 1-pint straight-sided wide-mouth canning jars (specifically made for canning jams and jellies) lids and rings by boiling for 10 minutes (keep the lids and rings in the hot water until ready to use); set aside. In a small bowl stir together flour, sugar, baking soda and cinnamon, if desired. Set aside. In a medium saucepan combine butter or margarine, water and cocoa powder; heat and stir until butter or margarine is melted and mixture is well blended.Remove from heat; stir in flour mixture. Add buttermilk, egg and vanilla; beat by hand until smooth. Stir in nuts. Pour mixture into the prepared canning jars; place jars onto a cookie sheet. Preheat oven to 325°F. Bake for 35-40 minutes or until a pick inserted deep into each cake comes out clean. Remove cakes from the oven, one at a time. Place a lid, then a ring onto the jars and screw down tightly. USE HEAVY-DUTY MITTS, the jars ARE HOT!! Place jars onto your counter to cool. You'll hear a "plinking" sound. If you miss the sound, wait until the cakes are cool and press on the lids, they shouldn't move at all, that means they've sealed. Store cakes in a cool, dark place.
Apple Cake In A Jar Recipe
Ingredients
2/3 c Shortening
1 1/2 tsp Salt
2 2/3 c Sugar
3 c Flour
4 Eggs
2/3 c Water
1 tsp Cinnamon
3 c Apples; Grated
2 tsp Baking soda
2/3 c Raisins
1/2 tsp Baking powder
2/3 c Chopped nuts
Directions
Mix the ingredients together in the order given. Sterilize 7 to 9 wide mouth pint jars and lids. Grease them with shortening. Fill the jars 1/2 full and bake on the middle wire rack in the oven. Bake for 45 minutes at 325°F. As soon as the cake is done, remove the bottles from the oven one at a time. Wipe the rim of the bottle clean with cloth and put on the hot sterilized lids. Screw down the bands and let cool. Important - Do not use small mouth jars. Do not add any other ingredients. As the cake cools in the sealed jar, it will pull away from the sides of the jar and come out easily when ready to serve.Slice and serve with lemon sauce.
LEMON SAUCE
2 tbls. Cornstarch
2 tbls. Butter
11/2 cup sugar
4 1/2 tsp finely grated lemon rind
pinch of salt
2 tbsp lemon juice
1 cup boiling water
In a pan , thourghly stir together the corn starch, sugar, and salt. Gradually stir in the boiling water, stirring constantly to keep it smooth. Continue stirring and cook over moderate heat until boiling. Boil gently for about 20 minutes. Remove from heat, add butter , lemon rind and juice. Stir thourghly . Serve hot over apple cake in a jar. Makes about 1 1/4 cups This sauce is thicker and more tart than the usual lemon sauce.
PEOPLE COME INTO YOUR LIFE FOR A REASON
People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person. When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.
Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.
Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.
(Written By Anonymous Author)
Submitted by Connie Mohney
Many know Christina’s story and many do not. This is an email is an introduction, grieving, and celebration of Christina.
Christina Nicole was born 2 April 2003 to the proud parents, Doddie and Scott Slack also to the proud big brother, Brian Keith Slack (10 June 93 SMA-Free carrier status unknown). She was the center of our lives. She had us wrapped around her little finger. She always had a smile as big as the universe if not larger. She would smile and her whole face would light up. We did everything with Christina. She went on her camping trip August 2003 at the big age of 4 months. It was October 2003 when we got the devastating news that our precious little girl was slowly dying and there was nothing we could truly do about it except make her life as full feeling as we could possibly make it. She was a cat for Halloween which was her favorite holiday because her favorite color (orange) was everywhere she would look. She had her ears pierced in November along with her first Thanksgiving which she had the turkey dinner. She was Dedicated/Baptized in November as well. She made her road trip to New Jersey to meet Dr. Bach in December 2003. Her first and only Christmas was a white Christmas. She spent roughly 6 days in the hospital in January first from pneumonia and then from losing her swallow. She had her g-tube placed in February before her first Valentine’s Day. The week prior to 15th March, I told my son, Brian that the pictures were going to but just of Christina. He fought me tooth and nail to have his pictures taken with his sister. To this day I am so thankful I gave in to him and let him have his picture taken with her. The day of their pictures is the day she earned her wings. They had their pictures taken at about 4 or so and she earned her wings about 630pm in our living room even though she was pronounced at 730pm by the ER doctor. For the couple of days leading up to her funeral there was a nagging problem like I was forgetting something important. I didn’t stop until I figured it out. It was something significant it was a sign from our angel telling us she chose that particular day to go home to Jesus. March 15 holds to very important events in the life of Christina Nicole Slack. March 15, 2003 was the baby shower to celebrate the soon to be birth of Baby Slack since we didn’t know the sex at the time. March 15, 2004 was the day Christina Nicole Slack earned her wings.
The funeral was just a formality to me for the family and friends. I still can’t get over the amount of people she touched that I didn’t know nor my husband. The day was calm and not too overbearing as some funerals I have attended. I feel that was how she wanted it. I feel she wanted to be remembered as the happy, bright, little angel she was. The last true feeling of her presence was the night of her funeral. Kathy, Godmother, Grandma Slack, Kathy, another friend of the family, and I were present for this. Daddy had blown some bubbles from her bubble supply. There was one lingering behind the TV. Kathy, Godmother, said that's Christina playing with the bubble shortly she will put it on top of the picture there on the TV. Seconds later the bubble was bouncing on top of the frame. Kathy, Godmother, told me to stand in front of the TV because she wanted to give me the bubble. It wasn't more than 5 seconds later the bubble all but jumps out at me and landed on my finger. I felt the sensation of a tiny finger gentle pressing on the bubble as it depleted to nothing. I believe this was the point in which I knew she was happy and we were going to be alright.
We all grieve in our own ways. I gave away her dog since he was always getting sick. We just couldn’t afford to keep taking him back to the vet so we gave him to Christina’s Great-Aunt. He hasn’t been sick since leaving our home. I picked up a gray kitten from next door who was born the month she passed away. I named her Angel which I think I named her wrong she’s more like the devil. About November 2004, I started paying on my boy Cameo, 8 year old Arabian gelding. I wanted to share the world of horses with my daughter and from her I learned you need to live life to its fullest for tomorrow may never come. Cameo has been the best grief therapist I could have asked for.
Here we are almost 2 years later, we have continued to live our lives. Brian is doing well in school was playing baseball but now has moved on to football. I have my horseback riding as a hobby. My husband is picking up the hobby of photography so maybe we will do our own portraits in the future. My career is moving along like I had hoped and so is my husband’s. We miss our angel everyday but I feel she has giving us the strength to move on with our lives.
Doddie, Mom to Angel Christina, SMA 1
02 Apr 03 to 15 Mar 04
www.christinaslacksmafund.com
www.babiesonline.com/babies/c/christ
www.smasupport.com
www.our-sma-angels.com
Hope From Heaven
At the end of his life, Chris told his mother he was ready to go to heaven. But what if heaven didn't really exist?
By Joan Wester Anderson
From the website of Joan Wester Anderson. www.joanwanderson.com
Maureen Howell of Bloomingdale, Illinois, always believed in an afterlife, and raised her children with the same faith. But when her son Chris faced death, Maureen's belief wavered. How did she know, after all, that there was a heaven, or that Chris would reach it safely?
Chris, a hemophiliac, had had a childhood marked by hepatitis, a liver transplant, severe relapses and only brief periods of good health. He did manage to graduate from high school due in part to the prayerful support of people who knew him and, despite a noticeable weight loss, went for his college physical during the summer of 1988. It was then his physician discovered that Chris had contracted AIDS from a contaminated transfusion.
Maureen's extended family is huge--hundreds of first and second cousins on her mother's side alone. Once again, everyone began to pray. But Chris was exhausted from his battle with sickness and pain. "Tell everyone to stop praying for me, Mom," he told Maureen. "I'm ready to die and go straight to heaven."
Heaven. It was one thing to read about it in a book, another to believe when one’s heart was breaking. Could Maureen believe? What if she had been wrong all along? She blinked back tears.
Chris seemed to read her mind. "Don't worry, Mom. When I get there, I'll send you a sign that I'm happy with our Father."
A sign. Was such a thing possible? Maureen wondered. But soon Chris hemorrhaged and lost his speech, and on November 20, he died. It was a peaceful death, but was Chris in heaven? Maureen had no idea what kind of sign to look for, or even if she should hope for one. She told only her immediate family of her strange pact with her son--others would surely think her mad.
A few weeks later, a distant cousin of Maureen's was running the vacuum when her four-year-old son Ryan awakened from his nap and bounced down the stairs. "Mommy, Mommy, Chris was in my room!" he shouted.
"Who?" Surely Ryan didn't mean Chris Howell. The two had never met; in fact, the child didn't even know Chris had died.
"It was Chris, Mommy." Ryan was adamant. "He played with me. And he said he was very happy."
"He did?"
"Uh huh. I asked him to come back and play with me again. But he said he couldn't stay here anymore. He had to go and be with his Father." Ryan's mother was getting goosebumps. How could a preschooler be so specific? She called Maureen, and wept with her as both recognized the exact message Chris had promised to send. It was truly the sign Maureen had been waiting to receive.
Heavenly comfort isn't always brought by angels; sometimes our loved ones can be messengers too. Maureen Howell misses her son, but she has no doubts now. She will see him again.
Some Links To Share
God Sent An Angel
Candle For Life - Solar Memorial Etarnal light
Garden Decor, Outdoor Furniture, Home Accessories & More
Prom & Graduation Party Guide - Ideas, Decorations, Gifts, E-Cards, Traditions
"The only cure for grief is to grieve"
Unknown
If you have something you would like included in next months newsletter, please e-mail Judi
Editor: Judi,
Staff: Brenda,Krista, Lynn, Laurie, Mylene, Holly, Linda,
Angel Moms Web Site
