Date
Name
On This Date
Mom/E-mail
Dec. 1, 1975
Andrew Maestas
Was Born
Florence M.
Dec. 1, 1997
Ricky Harris
Became An Angel
Joanie H.
Dec. 1, 2002
Debra "Debbie" Smith
Became An Angel
Betty B.
Dec. 1, 2004
Gemma Louise Ling
Became An Angel
Shirley L.
Dec. 2, 1970
Steven John Passalaqua
Was Born
Marlene P.
Dec. 2, 1972
Damon
Was Born
Belinda M.
Dec. 2, 1997
Jayse Ryan Hughes
Was Born
Amanda H.
Dec. 2, 1980
Christopher McCaleb
Was Born
Cindy M.
Dec. 2, 2002
Robert McIntosh
Became An Angel
Kat M.
Dec. 2, 2003
Sarah Elizabeth
Became An Angel
Sue W.
Dec. 2, 2003
Chelsie
Became An Angel
Linda A.
Dec. 3, 1974
Mike Sapp
Was Born
Bev S.
Dec. 3, 1977
Shane Hebert
Was Born
Judi W.
Dec. 3, 1987
Sarah Burnham
Was Born
Tracy B.
Dec. 3, 2003
Aislinn Celeste McComsey
Became An Angel
Donna S.
Dec. 3, 2004
Brandon Curtis Morton
Became An Angel
Susan S.
Dec. 4, 1981
Gabrial
Was Born
Lnn
Dec. 4, 1992
Laurie Baer
Became An Angel
Shirley B.
Dec. 4, 2000
Abby
Was Born
Donna S.
Deb. 4, 2002
Lindsey Renea Ogle
Became An Angel
Donna O.
Dec. 4, 2002
Darryl Gene Roark Jr.
Became An Angel
Elizabeth R.
Dec. 5, 1983
Lisa Emily Benson
Was Born
Cheryl R.
Dec. 5, 1983
Bob
Was Born
Amy H.
Dec. 5, 1983
Cory Alan
Became An Angel
Lauri
Dec. 5, 1999
Matthew
Became An Angel
Angela
Dec. 5, 2000
Abby
Became An Angel
Donna S.
Dec. 5, 2000
Jonathan
Was Born An Angel
Donna S.
Dec. 5, 2002
Corey R. Shaw
Became An Angel
Kathi S.
Dec. 5, 2004
Jacob Ryan Wilson
Became An Angel
Sarah W.
Dec. 6, 1979
Joseph Dourdis
Was Born
Diane D.
Dec. 6, 2001
Rob
Became An Angel
Gladys P.
Dec. 6, 2001
Christian Victoria "Chrissie" Carrigan
Became An Angel
Kathie C.
Dec. 7, 1984
Jett Garner
Was Born
Alison G.
Dec. 7, 1999
Allie Rose Hyatt
Was Born An Angel
Sharon S.
Dec. 7, 2002
Jessica Hine
Became An Angel
Shirl
Dec. 7, 2002
Mashanda Nicole Taylor
Became An Angel
Michelle
Dec. 7, 2004
Dylan Thomas Escareno
Became An Angel
Cynthia E.
Dec. 8, 1986
Julia Katherine
Was Born
Ann W.
Dec. 8, 1989
Owen Dainty
Became An Angel
Amanda F.
Dec. 8, 1990
Abby
Was Born An Angel
Bonnie M.
Dec. 8, 1995
Jeremiah Barlow
Became An Angel
Lori R.
Dec. 8, 2001
Justina Ross Worthington
Became An Angel
Priscilla W.
Dec. 8, 2002
Christopher Eric Scott
Became An Angel
Wendi M.
Dec. 9, 1973
Jeremy Oberry
Was Born
Audrey
Dec. 9, 1995
Marilynn Williamson
Was Born
Renee W.
Dec. 9, 2001
Adaja DeAngela Arnold
Was Born
Ardelia W.
Dec. 9, 2002
Quads: Seth Michael, Gabrielle Sophia, Josiah Nathan, Mickellah Faith
Were Born
Becki B.
Dec. 9, 2002
Quads: Seth Michael, Gabrielle Sophia, Josiah Nathan, Mickellah Faith
Became Angels
Becki B.
Dec. 10, 1985
Heather Lynn Vore
Was Born
Nancy M.
Dec. 10, 1990
Joe Gardiner
Became An Angel
Nancy G.
Dec. 10, 1996
Andrew Hooker
Was Born
Doris H.
Dec. 10, 1999
Amy Marie Freeman
Was Born
Monica F.
Dec. 10, 2002
Kimlan Le
Was Born
Carolyn L.
Dec. 11, 1982
Erika Kai Nogel
Was Born
Debbie N.
Dec. 11, 1996
Ashley Marie
(Karen's Grandaughter)
Was Born
Karen M.
Dec. 11, 2001
Tyrell Thunder Runns
Was Born
Cristy A.
Dec. 12
Girl/Boy Twins
Were Born Angels
Roni C.
Dec. 12, 2000
Savannah Kristyne
Was Born
Darcy N.
Dec. 13, 1972
Justin Fuzzell
Was Born
Belinda H.
Dec. 13, 1995
Anna
Was Born An Angel
Megan L.
Dec. 13, 2004
Johnny Alan Gallegos
Became An Angel
Jody S.
Dec. 14, 2000
Robert Ferreira
Became An Angel
Lee F.
Dec. 14, 2002
Pedro Geraldo Weiss-Salinas "PJ"
Became An Angel
Denise W-S.
Dec. 14, 2003
Kristin Amill
Became An Angel
Linda A.
Dec. 14, 2004
Baby Crowe
Was Born An Angel
Nicole
Dec. 15, 1994
April Abilez
Became An Angel
Judy A.
Dec. 15, 2001
Kaleb Charles Lockler
Became An Angel
Lexy L.
Dec. 15, 2002
Zachariah Adam Young
Was Born An Angel
Margo Y.
Dec. 16, 1970
Douglas Krause
Was Born
Dora K.
Dec. 16, 1995
Felicia Lynette Mabray
Became An Angel
Robin R.
Dec. 16, 2002
Cruz
Became An Angel
Tracey P.
Dec. 16, 2004
Charles Jr.
Became An Angel
Vicky N.
Dec. 16, 2004
Michael
Became An Angel
Pat S.
Dec. 17, 1973
Kevin Foster Gilmore
Was Born
Janice G.
Dec. 17, 1974
Jeff
Was Born
Lorraine
Dec. 17, 1988
James Micheal
Became An Angel
Karen H.
Dec. 17, 1998
Wesley Michael Myers
Was Born
Kim W-M.
Dec. 17, 2001
Angel Felipe
Was Born An Angel
Rachel L.
Dec. 17, 2001
Travis Dale Vassar
Became An Angel
LaNette V.
Dec. 17, 2002
Jacob Michael Carithers
Was Born
Melanie
Dec. 18, 1983
Andrew
Was Born
Chris B.
Dec 18, 1994
Bradlee Leeland Wiacek
Became An Angel
Dawn
Dec. 18, 2001
Julie Elayne Jackson Richardson
Became An Angel
Jeanne J.
Dec. 18, 2001
Adam Daniel Hultin
Was Born
Pam H.
Dec. 18, 2004
Kaedin Newberry
Was Born
Mary N.
Dec. 19, 1968
Sharra Nichols
Was Born
Jo Ann N.
Dec. 19, 1997
Jordan Bryce Majeski
Was Born
Beth A.
Dec. 20, 1972
Paul Chambers
Was Born
Agnes C.
Dec. 20, 1984
Alexa Noel
Was Born
Janine
Dec. 20, 2001
Jordan Bischoff
Was Born
Heidi B.
Dec. 20, 2002
Ryan
Became An Angel
Debbie M.
Dec. 20, 2003
K. Adrienne Paris "Annie"
Became An Angel
Patsy P.
Dec. 20, 2003
Joshua
Was Born
Emma
Dec. 20, 2004
Unknown Angel
Was Born An Angel
Michelle Y.
Dec. 21, 1972
Lerra
Was Born
Debbie
Dec. 21, 1984
Andrya Lianne Hobbs
Was Born
Theresa H.
Dec. 21, 1999
Grayson Ryan
Became An Angel
Darla D.
Dec. 21, 2000
Zachary Michael Richards
Was Born
Heather R.
Dec. 21, 2000
Monique Ozbardakci
Became An Angel
Veronica O.
Dec. 22
Girl/Boy Twins
Were Born Angels
Roni C.
Dec. 22, 1993
Cody James Leimer
Was Born
Jill L.
Dec. 22, 1993
Shawna Lynn Virden
Was Born
Loressa P.
Dec. 22, 2002
Logan Taylor Bradlee Ponder
Became An Angel
Becki P.
Dec. 23, 1986
Braxton Everett
Was Born
Jill R.
Dec. 23, 2001
Elizabeth Grace Young
Was Born An Angel
Margo Y.
Dec. 23, 2002
Ted "TJ" Carroll
Became An Angel
Sandie
Dec. 23, 2003
Jeremiah Paul Bonner
Became An Angel
Tamara B.
Dec. 23, 2004
Michael Dale Walker
Became An Angel
Arlene W.
Dec. 24, 1974
James "Toby" King
Was Born
Dot K.
Dec. 24, 1976
Melissa Renee Davis
Became An Angel
Virginia G.
Dec. 24, 1982
Kelly Jean Kirkpatrick
Was Born
Denise K.
Dec. 24, 1988
Derek Lee
Was Born
Amie T.
Dec. 24, 1993
Anthony Georgiadis
Was Born
Veronica G.
Dec. 24, 1996
Daniel Coates
Became An Angel
Connie P.
Dec. 24, 1997
April Gardner
Became An Angel
Joy G.
Dec. 24, 1998
Chad Nelson
Became An Angel
Lola S.
Dec. 24, 2002
Darryl
Became An Angel
Lisa J.
Dec. 24, 2002
Ryan
Became An Angel
Debbie M.
Dec. 24, 2002
Darryl Roark Jr.
Became An Angel
Lisa
Dec. 25, 1978
Kenneth Shawn Phillips
Became An Angel
Deborah T.
Dec. 25, 1985
Melissa Noelle Hanson
Was Born
Loni W.
Dec. 25, 1985
Wayne Michael Boatwright Jr.
Was Born
Maria B.
Dec. 25, 2002
Faustino, Royce & Rico Medina
Became Angels
Jennifer M.
Dec. 26, 1996
Benjamin Taylor & Brock Cassidy
Were Born
Suzanne F.
Dec. 26, 1996
Brock Cassidy
Became An Angel
Suzanne F.
Dec. 26, 2001
Devin Hutchison
Became An Angel
Jan H.
Dec. 26, 2001
Adam Daniel Hultin
Became An Angel
Pam H.
Dec. 26, 2002
RickHell Amos-Sparks
Was Born
Kassandra A.
Dec. 26, 2003
Aurora Andrea Harris
Was Born
April H.
Dec. 26, 2003
Became An Angel
Was Born
April H.
Dec. 27, 1981
Elliot "Elly" Joseph Matos Jr.
Was Born
Donna M.
Dec. 27, 1985
Dustin
Was Born
Laurie H.
Dec. 12, 1985
Chad Randall Miller
Was Born
Melanie M.
Dec. 27, 2001
Gregory Proce
Became An Angel
Heather P.
Dec. 27, 2001
Joseph Dourdis
Became An Angel
Diane D.
Dec. 27, 2003
Kaley Elizabeth
Became An Angel
Bridgit
Dec. 27, 2004
August Ryan Casares
Became An Angel
Tanya C.
Dec. 28, 1978
Shane Lee Cross
Was Born
Brenda C.
Dec. 28, 2002
Austin
Was Born An Angel
Wendy B.
Dec. 28, 2003
Emily Katherine Ryan
Was Born An Angel
Jennifer R.
Dec. 28, 2004
William Thomas Atkinson
Was Born An Angel
Dawn A.
Dec. 29, 1982
Matthew
Was Born
Kathy Z.
Dec. 29, 1996
Michael Wolfe
Became An Angel
Joycee H.
Dec. 29, 1999
Shawn Micheal Walker
Became An Angel
Capri W.
Dec. 29, 2003
Issaiah Sean Daniels
Was Born
Cheryl V.
Dec. 29, 2004
Colleen Avans
Became An Angel
Susy B.
Dec. 30, 1972
Shane Mohney
Was Born
Connie M.
Dec. 30, 1998
Andrew Richards
Was Born
Havivah C.
Dec. 30, 2001
Ryan David Jozwiak
Became An Angel
Lenee J.
Dec. 30, 2001
Jerad Kelley-Brown
Became An Angel
Rosa B.
Dec. 30, 2001
Amber Rose Dickey
Became An Angel
Roberta D.
Dec. 30, 2002
Christopher Blake Hill
Was Born An Angel
Carla H.
Dec. 30, 2004
Hayden Michael
Was Born An Angel
Shasta W.
Dec. 31, 1968
Dawn Marie Sierra
Was Born
NaDeen S.
Dec. 31, 1978
Tracy Donna Christopherson
Was Born
Donna C.
Dec. 31, 1995
Nicholas
Was Born
Renee
Dec. 31, 1999
Patrick Joseph Little
Became An Angel
Shirley L.
Dec. 30, 2000
Alex
Became An Angel
Sue
Dec. 31, 1976
Diane Michele Wade Buonanduci
Was Born
Diane C.
Dec. 31, 2001
Georgina "Georgie" Elizabeth Rosina
Was Born
Nicki W.








Our Featured Mom for the month of December is Melody Hill

Hello Moms, my name is Melody Hill and I am honored to be chosen Featured Mom for December. I know that there are so many other Moms who are probably more deserving of this honor. We have a wonderful support group here, that has been a blessing to all of us.

I joined AngelMoms on March 5, 2005, which was my son's first angel date, exactly seven days before his 23rd birthday. Adam was killed by a drunk driver in an alcohol related wreck. Adam was such a talented child who always kept our lives interesting. He loved people and animals so much. He was our "cowboy" and we called him a "people magnet". He has a surviving brother, Jared-21, and I have been married to their father, Craig, for over 27 years. Adam was also married and had a 3 month old daughter, who will be 2 years old on December 10th.

We had such a perfect life before we lost Adam. Adam and Jared both play guitars and Adam sang. There was always music in our home, and both boys loved to entertain wherever they went. We miss the fun and laughter now. Acceptance is such a difficult thing.

I always dreamed of being a wife and mother. I am honest, caring, and compassionate towards others. I love people and all animals. (We have 5 dogs, 2 cats, 2 horses, and 10 cows.) I have lost alot of my family already, but losing my son was the most devastating. I also lost 3 babies to miscarriage several years ago. I have made so many friends here in our group and I've gotten quite close to several of them. Karen Miller and Diane Craddock have been the two main Moms here that have been my biggest supporters. They have always been there for me everyday since I met them, and I appreciate their love and kindness. I also appreciate Judi choosing me to be a contact Mom last year for the retreat. It was exciting and I can't wait to go next year! Judi has such a big caring heart for everyone and she's also been so kind to me. All the Moms here that I've talked to are very understanding and supportive, and they've become special friends. I hope everyone gets as much from this group as I have. I hope you all find some peace and joy in your lives again. That is what our Angels would want for us.

God Bless You All!
Love & Hugs,
Melody Hill





Merry Christmas from Heaven

I still hear the songs
I still see the lights
I still feel your love
on cold wintery nights

I still share your hopes
and all of your cares
I'll even remind you
to please say your prayers

I just wanted to tell you
you still make me proud
You stand head and shoulders
above all the crowd

Keep trying each moment
to stay in His grace
I came here before you
to help set your place

You don't have to be
perfect all of the time
He forgives you the slip
If you continue the climb

To my family and friends
please be thankful today
I'm still close beside you
in a new special way

I love you all dearly
now don't shed a tear
Cause I'm spending my
Christmas with Jesus this year

©&(P) Copyright 1990.
John Wm. Mooney, Jr.
All Rights Reserved



CANDLES IN DECEMBER

My sadness seems reflected
In the music that I hear...
Every young one's glowing face,
Reminds me you're not here.

Shoppers crowd the festive stores,
emotions all run high,
This world I was a part of once,
Seems to pass me by.

This season's meant for happy times,
For love, warm hearts, and cheer,
But grieving families around the world,
Remember those not here.

We struggle through the season,
Lighting candles to proclaim,
Our children aren't forgotten,
Round the world our candles flame.

I slowly pass through the gates thrown wide,
One clear, cold Christmas day,
No toys or gifts do I bring,
Those are gifts of yesterday.

I carry with me just a polished heart
That is granite made,
And walk with grief to where my child lies,
In a silent silvered glade.

"Merry Christmas Love" I whisper,
The quiet words seem so forlorn,
"I've brought my heart for you to keep,
My gift, This Christmas morn."

"It is filled with all my love,
Though this one's carved of stone,
I'll place it here---it will be near,
You'll never be alone."

Please keep my gift, beloved child,
Close to where you lie,
And know my love surrounds you,
Until the day, I too shall die.

Author Unknown





Christmas.....a time that should be filled with joy brings sadness to those of us who have lost children. Losing a child is hard, but the holidays seem to make it even harder.

In the beginning, I never though I would enjoy Christmas again. But after eight years, I have found joy in the holidays, even though they bring sadness too.

Some things I have found helpful to make sure you take some time for yourself. Do whatever you want, this time is just for you. You need to take care of yourself. Don't do things just because people expect you to, do what you feel comfortable with, know your limits.

Do something in memory of your child. I buy a gift for a needy child in Shane's memory. I buy my girls a special gift in Shane's memory, it is something that reminds them of him. I even buy Shane a gift, something to go on his grave. I still hang his Christmas stocking with all the rest. On Shane's birthday, the 3rd of December, we decorate his grave and put up his tree with special decorations and battery powered lights. Then on Christmas Eve before our family gets together, we meet at the cemetery and light candles and turn on the lights on his tree, we sing Christmas carols and share memories. Below you will find lots of special things others members do in memory of their children during the holidays.

Holidays can be stressful under the best of circumstances, but when you are grieving and missing your child, it makes it harder. So be gentle with yourself and remember, you are not alone.....

Wishing you all a peaceful holiday season.





Caring for yourself during the holidays

1. Be honest ~ tell family and friends how you really feel about the holidays. Family and friends are often unable to understand how painful the holidays can be for someone who is grieving the loss of a child. We can help them to learn by telling them that loss becomes more obvious when we think of happy holiday memories, when we realize what should hae been and could have been has been permanently changes, we watch others who are excited and joyful, and when we remember those special family gatherings and traditions. Don't try to hide hurt, loneliness, or longing. When you express yourself, you will feel better. If you try to suppress your feelings, you and others will experience more discomfort.

2. Be kind and gentle to yourself emotionally. It is OK to feel happy about things and to be heartbroken even within the same hour. The holiday ride can be an emotional roller coaster. Accepting this rather than fighting it lessens physical and emotional stress and helps you to be more honest with yourself and those around you.

3. Take care of yourself physically. Get adequate sleep, be moderate in food and drink, and get some exercise whether you want to or not.

4. Don't isolate yourself. It is natural to think you may be a burden to others because you are in pain. Isolating yourself only increases your loneliness and despair. Create a support network of friends and family by giving them some specific suggestions about what they can do to help.

5. Spend the holidays: as you have in the past, avoid the holiday, or do something brand new~spend it in a different place or designate it as a different day. THERE IS NOT A RIGHT OR WRONG WAY.

Recognise that the holidays will be hard no matter what you do or where you are.

Choice#1:
Be aware that keeping the same holiday traditions may increase your awareness of the place your child held in helping to create past memories. Try not to ignore or suppress any feelings that you have. If you can honor traditions this way, you may feel better about your ability to manage other events.

Choice#2:
It's not at all unusual to wish to avoid the holiday completely. Conceder taking a trip to get away from the painful surroundings. Designate a day other than the traditional one to celebrate your holiday.

Choice#3:
Maintaining some holiday traditions can be comforting to other family members and stabilizing for children who are grieving. Try simplifying the usual traditions. For instance, go to the home of another family member of friend, dine out, buy prepared foods instead of doing it all yourself. Trying to do it all will deplete your energy level and emotional strength when it is already low; it may also increase your sense of loss.

6. Help someone in need. The act of helping is healing for your emotional wounds. When you help to meet someone else's needs, you feel good about yourself. Many community agencies have families or individuals who need attention. Contact hospitals, nursing homes, orphanages, shelters, soup kitchens, and charities for suggestions of how you might help.

7. Take encouragement from the fact that you will survive this painful time. You will survive this time, even though you may feel as if it will never get better. You will find comfort and strength in your ability to survive the pain and manage successfully. It is OK to have a good time; enjoying the holiday does not mean that you have forgotten your child or miss him or her any less. How much you grieve is not a measure of how much you love. Don't try to hide or disguise your true feelings whatever they are.

8. Make a list of names of close friends and family members who want to help you through this time. This helps you, compliments the people who want to help, and gives them some direction in knowing what they can do.

9. Make a written list of what you need from other family members, and share the list with that person. For example: hugs, time to talk about your child, daily walks together, share photos, time to cry together.

10. Write a letter to your child and say all the things you are feeling. Write a letter to yourself including things your child would say to you with knowledge of the ain you are feeling.

11. Make a list called: "Close Friendship Needs for Tough Times." It would include things you would like for others to do for you. Here are some suggestions, add your own:

Please Do:
1. Call me - Don't ask me to call you.
2. Come visit.
3. Be available to listen to how I am really feeling - not how everyone thinks I should feel.
4. Talk with me about my child; I need to know someone still remembers.
5. Be available to just hold me while I cry, no need to try to make it better.
6. Invite me to go to church, or a memorial walk, or the cemetery.
7. Invite me for coffee, a visit, or a meal.
INCLUDE ANYTHING THAT WOULD BE MEANINGFUL TO YOU, NO MATTER HOW SMALL.

12. Make a list of things you are not able to do at this time. For example:
1. Call you if I need anything, I'm just not able to do that right now.
2. Be grateful and happy; right now I just hurt.
3.Believing time will heal; that time is not now.

13. Give these lists to the people who want to help you. Remember that it helps others feel important when they can truly be helpful. Without specific ideas about what is meaningful to you, people don't know what to do.
Fear of doing or saying the wrong thing most often keeps people from doing anything.

14. BE KIND TO YOURSELF. Having a difficult time during the holidays does not mean there is anything wrong with you.
Dealing with the death of your child is the most painful human experience. It does not mean you are weak, unable to get better, or have emotional limitations. It simply means that there is an enormous "hole" in your heart and life, and it cannot be filled by anyone else or anything else. Treat yourself as kindly and gently as you would treat someone else who is going through this kind of pain. Healing will come.





Hello and happy holidays to all of my Angel Mom sisters. I think that next to our angel’s birthdays and anniversaries, this time of year is one of the most difficult. The earth is growing colder, and the darkness settles in so early each night. Everywhere there is joyful music playing, colorful lights dancing, and the laughter of children. I believe that somewhere in there our angels are joining in the fun. They are listening to the beautiful carols and singing right along. They are dancing among the sparkling lights. They are tickling the children of earth and making them laugh with little angel kisses. Our angels are all around us, wanting us to share in the wonder of the season, even though are hearts are heavy. We can honor them in so many ways, from a simple act of kindness, to a charitable donation in their name. Buy a toy and donate it to Toys for Tots. Spend an evening reading holiday stories to children in the hospital. Go caroling at a nursing home or retirement community. Step outside on a quiet, snowy night, close your eyes and just listen. You might just hear the angels singing.

I wish all of you much love, many blessings and a peaceful holiday season.

“If instead of a gem, or even a flower, we should cast the gift of a loving thought into the heart of a friend, that would be giving as the angels give.”
- George MacDonald -





CHRISTMAS PAST, PRESENT & FUTURE

When I hear Christmas past, I don’t go way back to when I was a child. I go back to the years we celebrated with Jill. The years she was here with us from the time she was a baby until her last Christmas with us at the age of 19. Christmas past was so many happy years of dolls, toys, clothes, watching her open presents and seeing the smile and twinkle in her eyes. The hugs and kisses of thanks she gave were all I needed to enjoy the holiday. I remember Jill helping me make cookies and decorate the tree and wrap packages. She was always better than me with all of those things. Oh how I miss those years. Most people think of Christmas past and recall the fond memories and relive them each year. For those of us who have lost a child, we feel cheated out of spending all the Christmas’s to come with the kids we have lost.

When I hear Christmas present, the first thing I think of is how do I get through another year without Jill? If I had my way, I would not put a tree up, decorate the house, buy any presents or celebrate. Christmas would be just another day but realistically that is not fair to the rest of my family or the real reason we all celebrate in the first place. So that being said, what I do is try to honor Jill’s memory in some way. I decorate her resting place for the holidays usually with artificial flowers and a laminated poem. Since she was 20 years old when we lost her, I buy gifts for needy children. Maybe 2 ten year olds or 2 five and a ten year old. Whatever adds up to 20. Our Christmas now is very low key. I can’t say it will be that way forever, but for now that’s the way we do it.

When I hear Christmas future, I think of hopes and dreams that maybe somehow the magic of Christmas will return to me. Right now I can’t imagine that but if I ever get a grandchild, that would make a difference I’m sure. I envy all of you who have surviving little ones or grandchildren to make the holidays merry. Christmas future will never be the same without our angels with us but they all are watching down and wishing us joy. We have to do the best we can without them in their memory. I wish all Angel Moms a peaceful Christmas season and happy, healthy New Year!





A Gift of Patience

I stood in line at Dunkin’ Donuts, in need of a good cup of coffee, recently. There were several people ahead of me in line in the store and people waiting in cars at the drive thru. One woman walked around with a tray of 4-5 donuts and the other woman, an older woman, was doing her best to serve all of us. The customers were not happy and made comments about the service. The younger lady with the tray seemed oblivious to the line of grumbling people. One woman asked her for a donut, then asked again in Spanish. She seemed to be able to hear, but not understand. I knew that she could not help any of us and we were in the hands of the older woman. The two customers at the head of the line were served and left and then the two ladies in front of me were next. They put in their order. The older woman, “Red” per her name tag, took their order and offered a donut to make up for their wait. They turned to me and said “This would never fly in Boston” and “I can’t believe how they stay in business” and “Look! A letter stating that the service here is great!”, pointing to a framed letter, the result of a better experience than these two were having. They left with their donut, while Red continued to make the Coolatta that was ordered.

I was next. She looked at me as if she was going to cry. She said that there was usually another person there to help her, but that they had called in sick. I told her to take her time fixing my coffee. She said, “Thank you.” Sometimes we forget to be kind to people. It doesn’t cost a thing and I felt better when I walked out with my coffee then I did when I walked in. I had given both of us a gift. It didn’t cost anything and it was really easy to do.

This holiday season is a time to give. You don’t have to have money for these decisions-you just have to decide to make someone’s day a little more pleasant. We all can afford it and would probably welcome being on the receiving end too.

Have a Blessed Christmas and a Happy Chanukah! May we all value the greatest gifts we have-our family and friends. You can’t buy them in any store!







Supplies:
DecoArt™ Patio Paint™, Cloud White, Deep Waterfall Blue, Foxglove Pink, Holly Berry Red, Mistletoe Green, Pinecone Brown, Tiger Lily Orange, Wrought Iron Black

Forster® Woodsies™ Circles Large
Forster® Woodsies™ Circles, Small, 2
Forster® Woodsies™ Wooden Ovals, 2-inch
Lara's Crafts Doll Head Beads, 1¼ inch, 2
Lara's Crafts Wooden Button, ¼-inch
Chenille stem, black
Chenille stem, brown
Clay pot, 1½ inch, 2
Pom-poms, small, green, 2

Instructions:
FOR SNOWMAN: Use the flat brush to paint one clay pot and one doll head with White paint. Allow the paint to dry.

Glue the doll head to the bottom of the clay pot to make the snowman's body.

Use the liner brush to paint a scarf around the snowman's neck with Green paint. Allow the paint to dry.

Use the liner brush to make eyes and a mouth with Black paint. Allow the paint to dry. Use the liner brush to make a nose with orange paint. Allow the paint to dry. Use the liner brush to paint buttons and stripes on the scarf with Red paint. Allow the paint to dry.

Use the pouncer to make cheeks on the snowman with Pink paint. Allow the paint to dry. To make the ear muffs cut a 2½-inch piece of wire with wire cutters. Glue each end of the wire to the sides of the snowman's head. Cover each end of the wire with a small green pom-pom.

To make arms cut two 2-inch pieces of the brown chenille stem. Fold one piece in half and twist it to the other piece to make fingers. Repeat to make the other arm. Glue the arms to each side of the snowman.

FOR REINDEER: Use the flat brush to paint the pot, large circle and doll head with Brown paint. Allow the paint to dry.

Glue the doll head to the bottom of the clay pot to make the reindeer's body. Glue the large wooden circle to the front of the doll head for a nose. Use the flat brush to paint the button with Red paint. Allow the paint to dry and glue the button to the center of the nose.

Use the flat brush to paint the wooden sign with Blue paint. Allow the paint to dry. Use the flat brush to paint the two small wooden circles with Black paint. Allow the paint to dry.

Use the liner brush to make eyes and a mouth with Black paint. Allow the paint to dry. Use the liner brush to make a tongue with Red paint. Allow the paint to dry. Use the liner brush to write HAPPY HOLIDAYS on the sign with White paint. Allow the paint to dry.

Glue the wooden sign to the front of the reindeer. Glue the small wooden circles to the front of the sign for hooves.

Cut two 4-inch pieces and four 2-inch pieces of the black chenille stem. Fold the 2-inch pieces in half and twist it to the longer pieces to make antlers. Glue the antlers to the top to the reindeer's head.



Supplies:
DecoArt™ Patio Paint™, Cloud White, Deep Waterfall Blue, Fiesta Yellow, Geranium Red, Outdoor Snow, Pinecone Brown, Tiger Lily Orange

Ceramo Clay Pot, 4-inch and 6-inch
Ceramo Clay Saucer, 4-inchand 6-inch
Forster® Woodsies™ Wooden Ovals, 2-inch
Lara's Crafts Flower Pot, Wooden, 1-inch x 1-1/8-inch
Lara's Crafts Wooden Button, ¼-inch
Lara's Crafts Wooden Piece, Disk, 1¼-inch
Lara's Crafts Wooden Piece, Dome, 2-inch
Lara's Crafts Wooden Piece, Square, 1-inch
Chenille stem, green
Craft sticks
Paintbrush, flat shader, No. 4
Paintbrush, flat, No. 12
Paintbrush, liner, No. 1
Palette
Old toothbrush
Water container

Instructions:
Use large flat brush to basecoat saucers with Deep Waterfall Blue paint. Allow to dry. Mix equal parts of Cloud White paint and water. Use toothbrush to spatter paint saucers with thinned paint mixture.

Use large flat brush to basecoat clay pots with Geranium Red paint. Allow to dry. Glue small saucer to bottom of small pot. Glue large saucer to top of large pot. Glue small pot and saucer to large pot and saucer as shown.

To make windows basecoat wooden square and disk with Cloud White paint using small flat brush. Allow to dry. Use pouncer to apply Fiesta Yellow paint to square and disk. Lightly shade the windows with Tiger Lily Orange using the edge of the pouncer. Allow to dry. Outline the windows and window panes with Deep Waterfall Blue. Allow to dry.

Basecoat the wooden pot, dome and ovals Cloud White using the small flat brush. Once dry, paint with Pinecone Brown. Allow to dry. Use liner brush to add Deep Waterfall Blue hearts and dots to ovals. Allow to dry.

Glue round window to dome and glue to front of large clay pot for door. Glue square window to small clay pot, then glue on shutters. Glue wooden pot to roof for chimney.

Basecoat the wooden button Cloud White using the small flat brush. Once dry, paint with Deep Waterfall Blue. Allow to dry. Use liner brush to highlight with Cloud White and allow to dry. Glue to door for knob.

Snip both ends off of craft stick to make a 4-inch sign. Use large flat brush to paint with Pinecone Brown. While still wet, wipe off paint with a moistened paper towel. Allow to dry and write TOY SHOP with liner brush using Deep Waterfall Blue paint. Glue sign above door.

Cut and shape green chenille stem to form garland around door. Use end of paintbrush to add red berries to garland with Geranium Red paint. Allow to dry.

Use remaining popsicle stick to apply snow to roof areas, chimney, above window, sign, and garland. Allow to dry.

Directions:




How do I remember Melissa at Christmas? I buy a poinsettia plant at church every year in her memory. I put a memorial in the local newspaper. I hang up her stocking with all the other kids. I write her a letter in a journal. We put lights in the 2 trees in our backyard planted in her memory that are lit every night.

Other ways I remember her--I have 2 trees planted in my backyard in her memory. Around each of the trees I put brick edging that I painted on. One one it has her name and dates. The other has "In memory of Meliss". Under each tree is a angel figurine. We give a scholarship out every year to someone who has been nominated for their kindness and caring to others. I pay school fees for students who can't afford them. I lend graphing calculators to students in advanced math classes who can't afford to buy them. I have given a shoebox of gifts for Operation Christmas Child in her memory. I do a balloon release on her birthday (Christmas Day) and her angelversary date. I buy a Easter Lily for church in her memory at Easter.

Loni~Mom to Angel Melissa



What I do in Memory of Tiffany on Christmas
I go to her grave site and decorate with a small christmas tree and put silk christmas flowers around. I have ornaments that Tiffany made me though the years i hang on the tree we put in the house and also i have bought a ornament in her memory , its a Merry Christmas in Heaven ornament.

Holly~Mom to Angel Tiffany



Peanut became an angel just 10 days before Christmas. We are going to have her a birthday party that day with cake and gifts to be put on her grave. We are also going to put up the tree on that day and this year will be the first Christmas to add her and Johnathon to the tree. It was such a shock last year that I didn't think to add her to the festivities. Both babies will have mangers and trees on their graves and we are going to sing them carols. There are also two trees at our church called the angel trees where you bring angel ornaments and in a ceremony you tell who the angel is dedicated to as you hang it on the tree.

Mandi~Mom to Angels Johnathon and Peanut



This will be our first Christmas without Justin and we have decided we will all buy gifts like we would have for him and then donate them to our local fire department for the needy and homeless children. I think an Angel would like that!

Cyndi~Mom to Angel Justin



I remember my Angel Lee with white double chrysanthemums. I always have a vase full of them over the holidays because they are the flowers that his White Teddy Arrangement was made of at his service.

Jane~Mom to Angel Lee



My family and John's are getting together this year at our home, and instead of having adults exchange gifts, every adult is putting $50 in, which is going to be donated in Sean's name for Sainte-Justine's Childrens Hospital. I will have his candle buring, take his ornaments out, and stocking. I have a heart shaped wreath at his resting place.

Mylène~Maman to Angel Sean



This is my first Christmas without my son's physical presence-I am anticipating I will cry alot that week.

I have decided to put a small tree at the cemetary next to Colin's bench and put ornaments on it that all the people whose life Colin touched can take one and hang it on their tree every year in rememberance of Colin. I picked up the ornaments at Michaels and they had to be painted, I had a painting party at my house, we had chili, chicken & noodles, deserts and 10 of us painted till we couldn't see anymore. I am going to write Colin's name on them and seal them with a clear coat and place a small add in the paper so all the parents will see and take their children to see Colin's tree and take an ornament. Of course I will light a candle from x-mas eve through new years at my house.

Pam~Angel Colin's Mom



Every year I would get a couple of names from the trees around town that have needy childrens wishes. After getting the gift, I would meet Scott at the mall where he worked and we would walk to the drop off site together.

The first Christmas after Scott passed I didn't know how I could go on with it... but knew Scott would want me too, I was led to a family at the last minute who weren't going to have anything for the 2 boys and had a good time picking out and wrapping for the children and including a gift for the grandmother who had the boys (the mother ran off with a boyfriend right before the holiday leaving the children).

The next year we were led to the alternative school where Scott had attended and the lady who had been doing the gifts for the Teen Moms and their babies had to give it up that year for health, at the time I inquired they didn't know what they were going to do to be able to continue... again I know Scott had a hand in it :oD While he went to school there I volunteered at the baby daycare on site and got to see Scott on his breaks so it had a special meaning for us both. We have continued to give to the Teen Mom/Baby program at Christmas in honor of Scott every year since. We give a toy, outfit and diapers plus I always try to make something for the teen mom too. This year I am knitting 'fuzzy' scarves for each one. I have never seen a group of young people so appreciative of the gifts, I remember one teen mom the first year was in tears and said that she was saving the gift to give from 'Santa' as it was the only thing her baby would be getting. I know Scott looks down from Heaven and is warmed by the babies gifts we give.

Brenda~Angel Scott's Mom



This year will be our first without our sweet angel Zackary. Last year at this time, he was in declining health in the NICU, and we were getting ready for another surgery, this one for his weakening heart. The NICU staff does attempt to make the unit festive during the holidays. One day, one of the nurses aides, who loved Zackary and spoiled him shamelessly, brought in a little fiber optic Christmas tree for his bedside. We set it up and I brought in little decorations for it. Zackary loved to watch as the colors changed and the ornaments sparkled. Right after Christmas, upon returning from the cardiac ICU after his surgery, I packed up the tree and gave it to the NICU, asking them to give it to another family the following year in hopes that it would bring comfort to them too. Two weeks later, Zackary became an angel, and the tree was forgotten. About a month later, the NICU desk clerk, who happens to live around the corner from me, knocked on our door and had the tree with her. The staff wanted us to have it as special reminder of our sweet baby boy, and his first and only Christmas on earth. So this year, and every year from now on, that little tree will have a special place in our house, and will be adorned with the many angel ornaments I have collected in the past year. It will always be Zackary’s first Christmas tree.

Krista~Angel Zackary's Mom



On Christmas Eve at my sister house she has an ornament that my Mom made in Devon's memory the first Christmas that Devon was gone, my sister waits till everybody is there & then gives it to me to hang on the tree & we sing Silent Night. On Christmas day my husband, daughter & son go to the cemetery & we all say whatever we want to Devon we take turns then I release a Christmas balloon with a card & watch it till we can't see it. Sometimes it is too cold & it won't go far but I still try. May you all have a Very Merry Christmas & God bless our Angels.

Teri~Angel Devon's Mom

I create table just for my angel, Christina, for every major holiday. I have little items that belong to her and a picture of her as well. I will post pictures under photos so you can see what I am talking about.

Doddie~Mom to Angel Christina



I put up a small tabletop tree in my foyer with all angel ornaments on it and call it my angel tree. Just for the babies. :)

Last year I sent this poem in my Christmas cards:

We've filled our hearts full of holiday cheer
and shopped for presents for loved ones this year.
The house is dressed up with garland and lights
that sparkle and shine through the holiday nights.

But even with all of this holiday bliss
there's someone we lost that we terribly miss.
And as this Christmas Day draws near
we wish with all of our hearts she was here.

She's living her life way up past the stars,
somewhere past Jupiter, Saturn, and Mars.
She's spending her Christmas in Heaven, you see
and last night as I slept, a dream came to me.

I was looking in her eyes and holding her tight
and realized that someday when the time is right -
I'll love her forever, in Heaven that is,
though in my heart she already lives.

She's left many gifts for us deep down inside
that we find everyday with our eyes open wide.
Each one is unique and wrapped brightly in love,
they shine from our hearts as she shines from above.

A special angel now hangs from our tree
for we are no longer a family of three.
And since we can't give her an earthly gift
we're asking God: "Please give her a kiss."

In loving memory of Hope Elizabeth Shiflett
& her angel sibling - born into Heaven in 2004

Kim~Mom to Angel Elizabeth & her Angel Sibling







In Memory of Suicide Victims' Christmas Tree

I am Angel Mom Debbie. I lost my son Josh, when he was just 15 on November 6, 1996, to Suicide. Josh is my firstborn. This will be my 10th Christmas without Josh. This year will be my 4th Christmas doing this World Wide Project.

The project is called, "Memory Tree of Lights."
A Tree is set up in each State to represent Victims of Suicide, so they are not forgotten. I represent Tennessee, which is where I now live and Ohio, where Josh was born and died. The Tree is lit day and night starting December 1st, thru January 1st. On my Tree I have laminated small hearts with the names, ages and the relation to the person that sent it in to me. I attach it to the Tree. My Tree unfortunately has lots of names, but, these people are not forgotten at my house, or at any other State Representatives home. The Tree is planted directly under my Computer room window so I can see it all day and night. Many people have come by to see it and sometimes attaches a name to it. One year a Girl Scout Group came and decorated it for me. They thought they would just get a "badge" for doing community service, but many walked away feeling quite different. When they could visually see the name and age and what relation it was to someone, it affected them, just the way I had hoped. If any of you would like a name attached to my Tree, or any other States Tree, please contact me MsBBSITTER@aol.com or angeljoshsmom@gmail.com. Below, I am attaching the website for the Main site for this Project.

I would be honored to add a name to my Tree. Our children we have lost to Suicide, should not be forgotten. Thank you....! Debbie

To learn more of this project click here: Welcome to memorytrees.org
or www.memorytrees.org





Losing somebody we love is terribly difficult. It leaves us feeling all mixed up—almost like we're going crazy. For a while, when the grief is so new and the pain is so raw, our world feels like everything has been turned upside down. We can't see straight, much less think straight.

The worst thing of all is the feeling we get from being separated from the one we love. We suddenly become acutely aware of everything about living—the common sounds of dishes clinking in the sink, water running in the shower, and the happy chatter of people laughing and talking. We miss every noise, every smell, and every touch that made life feel warm and happy when the one we loved was alive. When we lose a person we love, our hearts fill with an ache that we never knew existed.

It takes a long time to adjust to the loss of someone close.

There's no reason to apologize if we're having a particularly emotional moment and we are reduced to tears long after our loved one has died. Grief comes back often to visit. It takes courage and time to find our place in life following the death of someone we love. The path we are now traveling feels bumpy and full of obstacles. We have been given a special gift, though, to help carry us through. That gift is hope. Hope promises us strength enough for today. Hope gives us purpose to go on. Hope sends a ray of sunshine just when we need it the most. Hope reassures us that with every new sunrise there is a brand new day welcoming us. Hope reminds us that step-by-step we are walking out of the dark!

--Clara Hinton --

“When I asked for a ray of light, God gave me the sun to light up my entire universe.”

--Clara Hinton--





The Worldwide Candle Lighting®

In loving memory of all children who are no longer with us, The Compassionate Friends extends an invitation for you, your family, and friends to join tens of thousands of persons around the globe for the ninth annual Worldwide Candle Lighting.

On Sunday, December 11, 2005, hundreds of community candle lighting ceremonies will be held in parks, churches, and other public places by TCF chapters, allied organizations, and other compassionate groups. Thousands more will be held informally in homes. The Compassionate Friends Worldwide Candle Lighting is held every year on the second Sunday in December at 7 p.m. local time for one hour in each time zone around the globe—a 24-hour remembrance of all children who have died.

A “Remembrance Book” will be available from The Compassionate Friends website home page, Sunday, December 11, 2005 for all who wish to leave a message in memory of the children gone too soon. Please make plans to post a message that day. www.compassionatefriends.org

We do this . . . that their light may always shine!



I Light This Candle

I light this candle in memory of you,
My life, my child, my heart,
May it shine bright and true,
As you did from the start.

In it's flickering flame I see,
The life we shared together,
The love and wonderful memories,
That I'll carry with me forever.

I light this candle in memory of you,
I look up to the Heavens where you are,
I see the lights of Heaven shining bright too,
But your candle shines brighter than the brightest star.

My child you are still so much a part of me,
Even though you are no loner here,
You live on in my heart where you will always be,
No matter what, I will always keep you there.

On this special night I light this candle for you,
And I hope every one who sees it will know,
How very special you are, how much you are loved and missed too,
And will remember you with me when they see it's golden glow.........

Judi Walker
In memory of my son Shane & other
children who have left this earth
2003

Light a candle: National Children's Memorial Day




4th Annual World Wide Balloon Release 2005
Celebrating the Lives of our Children

Saturday December 3, 2005
All Day
This event repeats every year.

Balloon Release.com



Acts Of Kindness



Acts of Kindness for September were presented to:

Sharon Farrar By Linda Cutshall

The Act Of Kindness Award will be given to an AngelMom that was nominated for their kindness and thoughtfulness. It will not be a contest, it is "Thank You" kind of award. Anyone can be nominated. If someone has touched your heart by doing something special, please nominate them by emailing Debbie. There is no exclusions, everyone is included. We will list each member that has received an Award.

Angel Mom's Acts of Kindness







National Drunk & Drugged Driving Awareness Month

By Presidential decree, December is National Drunk and Drugged Driving (3D) Prevention Month.

Online Candlelight Vigils
The National Commission Against Drunk Driving :: NCADD
National Drunk and Drugged Driving Prevention Month





Peppermint Pretzel Wreath

Easy to make, hard to resist. This is one of those addictive salty-sweet snacks, and the addition of crushed peppermint makes it even better.

1 (24-ounce) package vanilla-flavored candy coating
1 (10-ounce) package large thin pretzels
1 (6.75-ounce) package peppermint candies, crushed
7 additional peppermint candies
5 small Christmas bows (optional)

Place candy coating in a large glass bowl, and microwave at HIGH 1 1/2 minutes or until coating melts, stirring once. Dip pretzels into candy coating, covering completely. Place coated pretzels on wax paper; sprinkle heavily with crushed peppermint. Let dry.

Place a single layer of pretzels around outside edge of a 12" serving tray. Continue layering remaining pretzels until wreath is 3" high.

Spoon seven small dots of remaining melted candy around top of wreath; press whole peppermints gently onto the wreath, allowing dots of melted candy to act as "glue." Let stand until firm. Decorate with bows, if desired.

Note: We used Golden Flake fat-free pretzels. You may want to buy two bags just to be sure you get enough unbroken ones for one wreath.

Yield: one 12" wreath



Christmas Pecans

5 tablespoons sugar, divided
1/4 cup butter or margarine, melted
1 tablespoon pumpkin pie spice
1 tablespoon grated orange rind
2 cups pecan halves

Stir together 4 tablespoons sugar, melted butter, pumpkin pie spice, and orange rind. Add pecan halves; toss to coat.

Place on a lightly greased aluminum foil-lined baking sheet. Sprinkle evenly with remaining 1 tablespoon sugar.

Bake at 350° for 20 minutes, stirring once.

Toasted Pecans: Toss 3 cups pecan halves with 1 1/2 tablespoons melted butter. Place in an aluminum foil-lined jellyroll pan. Bake at 325° for 10 minutes. Sprinkle 1 tablespoon coarse salt evenly over pecans, and bake 10 more minutes, stirring once.





GRIEF IS LIKE...

One of the difficulties bereaved persons face is how to explain to us how they FEEL, when they are grieving. What does it FEEL like to be in the skin of a bereaved person? Is it similar to other experiences in our life? Is there a way we can relate on some level to the pain of grieving persons when we are not grieving ourselves.

Most people can't allow themselves to go to the place where they could actually see themselves in the dark hole of grief. We don't want to believe it would be that bad for us, that we have the inner recources to minimize grief's hold on us, unlike our grieving friends. But if we can just connect their feelings with some feelings that we have experienced ourselves, then maybe, just maybe, we can begin to comprehend the impact of grief on a person's life. Then, after you connect with any of these feelings you need to remember to multiply your own feeling times x 100 to get closer to the bereaved person's experience.

Here are some feelings that I've experienced while grieving or that I've heard other bereaved persons describe.

GRIEF is like being in a bubble. You are no longer a part of the world around you. Everything sounds muffled. You hear conversations, but it's like the words have no meaning. Nobody can reach you. There is an uncomfortable distance that has been created between you and those who don't understand grief.

GRIEF is like looking through a one-way window. You can see others, but they can't see you. You feel invisible to others. It's hard to understand how the world can go on when life has stopped.

GRIEF is like wearing a heavy weight on your chest. You have trouble breathing. Sometimes your body takes deep sighing breaths in an attempt to get more oxygen. Sometimes you have anxiety attacks. And your heart actually aches. The location of your grief spot is right under your sternum close to your heart. It's no wonder that your chest hurts.

GRIEF is like wearing a heavy coat with all the pockets full of rocks. The grief literally weighs you down and slows you down. Grief is not only emotionally exhausting, but physically exhausting also. Because the warm glow of life is not pulsing through your body you may find it hard to keep warm. After a while that heavy coat of grief will begin to feel comfortable and you may decide you don't want to take it off.

GRIEF is like being a traveler on a high-jacked plane. It is as if you have been taken to a foreign land where you do not the know the language or the culture. Soon you learn you can never return to the world as you knew it. Grief can be pretty scary. You do not want to be there. You probably don't know how to grieve and you may not know what is expected of you. When you try to speak to your friends, they may not understand you. Your friends know you have "gone away" for a while, but they assume you will return and be the same old you they once knew. But then you begin to realize you will never return to that place again and that others may never know or understand this.

GRIEf is like the stages of love: first falling in love and being totally preoccupied by your new love, then becoming comfortable as you begin to trust that your love will always be with you. In grief, as when you first fall in love, your heart longs to be with the person who's died. Your desire to touch him or her is overwhelming. Most other parts of your life seem unimportant in comparison. Then slowly, normal life begins to creep back in and you find that your grief no longer demands the high maintenance that it first required. You will have created a special space in your heart where you can carry this departed loved one with you at all times, even as you go about other things.

Death ends a lifetime, but not a relationship.<

I welcome hearing other ways you relate to how your grief feels Pat Schwicbert. R.N. pat@tearsoup.com

Shared by Pat Gobel



The Holiday Bill of Rights for Those Who are Grieving

1. You have the right to say TIME OUT, anytime you need to. Time out to let up, blow a little steam, step away from the holidays, have a "huddle" time and start over.

2. You have a right to TELL IT LIKE IT IS when people ask, How are you? You have a right to tell them how you REALLY feel, not just what they want to hear.* You need to take care of yourself. Be attuned to your feelings. (*P.S. You also have the right to smile and say you're fine, because telling them how you really feel, isn't worth your time - some people will never understand anyway)

3. You have the right to SOME "BAH HUMBUG" DAYS. You don't have to be "Jolly Old St. Nicholas" all the time. You are not a bad person just because you don't feel like singing Christmas carols all day.

4. You have the right to DO THINGS DIFFERENTLY. There is no law that says you must always do Chanukkah and Christmas the same way. You can send 10 cards instead of 100 -- or no cards at all. You can open presents at somebody else's house. You can do without a tree. You can have a pizza instead of turkey! - the list is endless.

5. You have the right to BE WHERE YOU WANT TO BE. Be at home, or at the relatives or with friends. Be in any city, any state you choose! NOBODY SAID YOU HAVE TO HAVE SNOW TO HAVE CHRISTMAS. There's no law that says you must stay home!

6. You have the right to have SOME FUN. Don't be afraid of what someone will say if they see you laughing and having a good time. Laughter is every bit as therapeutic as tears. If you are doing something that your loved one would have also enjoyed, think of their laughter and feel their laughter inside of you. 7. You have the right to CHANGE DIRECTION IN MID-STREAM. Grief is unpredictable. You may be all ready to go somewhere or do something and be suddenly overwhelmed, immobilized. When that happens it's okay to change your mind.

8. You have the right to DO THINGS AT DIFFERENT TIMES. Go to church or synagogue at a different time. Open presents at a different time. Serve your meal at a different time. Give up and go to bed at a different time. Don't be a slave to the holiday clock.

9. You have a right to REST, PEACE, and SOLITUDE. You don't need to be busy all the time. Take a nap whenever you need one. Take time to pray and meditate to recharge your spirit, it can do you much more good than eating another huge meal.

10. You have the right TO DO IT ALL DIFFERENT AGAIN NEXT YEAR. Just because you change things one year: try on something different, does not mean you have written it in stone. Next year, you can always change it back or do it, in yet, another new way.

© 1992 Bruce H. Conley

Submitted by Loni Wendt



My dearest Kyle, How mommy misses you! This letter is not going to be a sad one, but instead a letter of miracles. Looking back on your short little life with us, I have realized the many miracles I have seen. I saw you take your first breath, when doctors told me you wouldn't make it into the world alive. I heard you cry, when I thought I would never hear that. I felt you squeeze my hand, and I felt your love from that squeeze. I saw you briefly open your eyes, as to reassure me that you would be OK!! I saw Jesus through you, I felt God's presence through your illness. I realized how many people cared for us, through your illness, and discarded the ones who couldn't be there for you. I realized what in life matters, and not to sweat the small stuff. I look at each day with wonder and so grateful for each day that we have. I am closer to God now then I have ever been. We were blessed with a healthy baby in Sept and I know honey you watched over us and kept us safe. I look at your baby brother with such wonder and can't believe how much thought God puts into making a baby. I never realized those things before, I took things for granted. I think about you spending Christmas with Jesus this year and my heart rejoices for you. How cool is that? I wish you could be here with us and that I could have seen more miracles with you, but I am thankful for the miracles I witnessed because of you, and will witnesses because of you. Thank God for me for my precious gifts he blessed me with, even though some of them came at a high price. I love you so very much honey and you are always on my mind. Merry Christmas my love, and Happpy Birthday Jesus!!!!!!!!!

Love, Mommy!



Some Links To Share

Christmas Angel
The Spirit of Christmas
A Child's Christmas Prayer
Popular Front Season's Greetings





Grief is not measured in time but when the
heart is dry of tears and your mind comes to
acceptance, you will begin to heal. Meanwhile,
you are not alone.
- Ginny Brancato -





Our t-shirts and sweatshirts and other products in the Angel Mom store have our new logo on them (logo above). We are ready to fill orders now and you will probably get them before Christmas.

Loni
Angel Moms Store



Contact Moms

We now have contact moms so that when someone goes on vacation, is in the hospital, moving, natural disasters or any thing that takes them away from the computer, we can keep in touch and updated on what is going on with them.

The main contact mom is Melody Hill (rnbow031281@yahoo.com) who lives in Ohio and assisting her is Diane Craddock(angelsarms2004@verizon.net) from Virginia, they are the contant moms for the US members. Canada's contact mom is Mylene Roberge (milourob@sympatico.ca ), Australia's contact mom is Christine Rowe (chrissylionhearted@yahoo.com.au) and England's is Pam Addington (pam26baby@yahoo.co.uk).

You can contact Melody for more informatin and phone numbers.

Thank you ladies for doing this for us!



Baby Shower Mom

Karen Miller is our baby Shower Mom. She will find out who's pregnant and when their due date is and keep in contact with them when they are almost due. When they are close to their due date, then she will write to the mom and see when a good time would be for her to be online to talk with us. We will send the expectant mom our support and good wishes. Then the new baby mom will get someone to call Karen when she has the baby and let her know what she has had, weight, length, etc.

You can contact Karen at alexmailmanwade@yahoo.com



Angel Moms Newsletter-December Printable Version

If you have something you would like included in next months newsletter, please e-mail Judi

Editor: Judi,
Staff: Kelly, Krista, Lynn, Brenda, Laurie

Angel Moms Web Site

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